My Turning Point
by Monique Du Toit
I have always known about God, but I never had a personal relationship with Him. I grew up in a Christian home. Followed the traditions of going to church, reading my Bible and praying, but never knew the goal was to have a personal relationship with God. At a young age my parents got divorced thus leading to a broken childhood. I lived with my mother and at the age of 17 and I saw my dad for the first time after 8 years.At the age of 15, I started self mutilation due to anger and confusion towards the world because of my broken childhood. This caused withdrawal and my relationship with my mother deteriorated. In 2001 I was diagnosed with Borderline depression which included an eating disorder. All of which became too much for me and I then attempted suicide. I was then placed in an institute for treatment. After good behaviour I was discharged. I moved to Rustenburg, stayed with my grandparents, worked and started living normally for a while...
I was in a relationship for 4,5 years and within this relationship, I was lead astray. No church, barely any prayer, reading the Bible only when times got tough. Idolatry, which was alcohol, fornication and drugs; in this I became an alcoholic and drug addict. In 2008, the relationship ended and I returned back to my grandparents. Still leading a life gone astray, God placed different children of God on my path. Because there were so many, I decided to perhaps start listening. I joined a Home Group and started visiting the church more often. In church on 29 September 2008, I instantly surrendered all to God. My craving for the alcohol and drugs vanished. When I realised this change in my life, was when I was doing all for others and none for myself. I died to self! My relationship with family members was restored. I met God personally for the first time. He picked me up when I fell. He is the source of my existence. He carried me when I couldn’t take life anymore, then He gave me life. He is my rock and my salvation.
My encouragement for you is that it is between you and God. And the reality is that once you have met Him, it is impossible for you to go astray. It is a reality that you can’t outlive Him or live without Him. Be open for the Father the Son and the Holy Spirit. Remember freedom leads to following Him via fellowship with that Father!
